Starting Over

 
More and more frequently I'm finding myself irritable. 


I want to scream and cry and break things. I want to lash out at anyone who talks to me.  I want to control every aspect of my life, and if I can't then I become upset. 


I feel so angry. 


Nobody I've talked to understands.  My mother listens to what I say then goes on to tell me stories about her own life.  That's not what I need.  My dad has enough to worry about. My doctor tells me about all the other people who have it much worse than I do. My friends don't want to be around me anymore, and I don't really want to be around them either. 


I can't stop thinking about where my life would be if all this hadn't happened. 


I can't stop thinking about what a waste of oxygen I am right  now. 


I don't feel excited or happy about any of my options regarding future plans. 


I don't know what I want, besides for this to have all been a long, terrible dream. 



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